Showing posts with label geekery. Show all posts
Showing posts with label geekery. Show all posts

Monday, August 11, 2008

I got nothing

Due to popular demand (ahem), this blog has been roused from it's crusty-eyed slumber and given a kick in the keister. It's a big keister, though, so it's still gonna be kinda slow-moving until it's had some coffee first.

Let's see — so what's been going on? Let's bullet-point this sucker:

• We still support Obama, even though conservative knuckleheads are trying to scare people by hinting that he might be the Anti-Christ. Hell, I might be supporting him even more now. And at least it would probably mean Infernaeon or The Sword would play the Inauguration. Also, people who think so little of the citizens that they would try to convince them some dude's the Anti-Christ would no longer be in charge. So, y'know, there's that.

• Speaking of stupid people — I really thought John Edwards was smarter than that. That'll teach me.

• Was I the only one who had visions of "Red Dawn" when the news first broke that Russia had attacked Georgia?

• I haven't seen the movie yet so I'm trying to hold off on straight-out judgment, but isn't it weird that Robert Downey Jr. is basically doing blackface in "Tropic Thunder"? I get that it's supposed to be satire, but still ... I hope it's used to say something other than, "ain't race funny?!"

• And finally, this:

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Farewell, Dungeon Master

I know I said I was tired of obits, but I couldn't let the death of Dungeons & Dragons co-creator Gary Gygax just go by without comment.

Even if you don't game, you've more than likely felt the influence of the granddaddy of role-playing games. I only started playing myself a few years ago (I could never find anyone who actually knew how to run a game), but it was the sort of thing you just sort of knew about, even if it was in a roundabout way. In the same way Robert E. Howard's Conan influenced the makers of D&D, D&D influenced other media.

If you're old enough (or geeky enough) you might remember the Dungeons & Dragons cartoon, which is still one of my favorites. When I was a teenager I also played a lot of Gauntlet — I always chose the barbarian — and of course there were tons of movies and books that owed a lot to D&D. I wouldn't be surprised if there was a Dungeons & Dragons-inspired script floating around Hollywood right now. And even today, right this second, there's a d20 hanging from the zipper on my messenger bag.

I haven't played D&D for a few months now, and I miss it. I like hanging out with friends and doing something that's inherently silly but also creative, imaginative and just fun. Gary Gygax deserves thanks for giving people a way to do that.

Thursday, January 31, 2008

Some random thoughts

• Like a big, hairy baby, a lack of sleep makes me cranky.

• So the national economy is collapsing under its own weight, so badly people are finally beginning to at least whisper the word "recession" out loud. It's going to get worse before it gets better, the average citizen is going to suffer the brunt of the downturn, and the government and banking industry are still trying to act like they're trying to save a burning building even though they provided the matches and oily rags. And I'm wondering if there's an accidental silver lining in all this: Before the economy became the Big News (what do you mean people are dying in Iraq? Afghanistan who?), there was a disturbing rise in Administration rhetoric about Iran. Sabres were rattling and experts were actually coming out and saying, desperately, "No! Bad!" but it didn't look as if anyone was listening. Now the Administration is forced to pay attention to something else. Here's my question: Did the failing economy save us from war with Iran?

(At least temporarily. I'd predict that as soon as the economy improves, or at least stabilizes, we'll be hearing more about how scared we're supposed to be of people who speak Persian. It'll be a non-starter, but still — the Administration's nuts.)

• I've got some really good friends, and I feel very lucky about that.

• That Tribeca coffee at Einstein Bagels? That's pretty good stuff right there.

• My wife is also awesome.

• I just found out that this blog is the first result if you Google "worst soup flavors."

• I haven't gamed (RPG) in something like two months. Why have the 12 Gods forsaken me? Why?!?

• If I could, I would totally grow a big ol' handlebar mustache.

Wednesday, January 02, 2008

I hate memes ... but try this one

You might not have noticed, but me and Lopez! tend to avoid all that meme, quizes, "tag-you're-it" bullshit, but I couldn't resist it this time. This was fun and let me flex some creative muscles I don't get to use all that often. It's not the sort of thing that you can just click your way through, which was something else I liked about it.

OK, so here's what you do:

1. Go to Wikipedia and hit "random." The first random Wikipedia article you get is the name of your band.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special:Random


2 - Go to random quotations: The last four words of the very last quote of the page is the title of your first album.

http://www.quotationspage.com/random.php3


3 - Go to Flickr and click on "Explore the last seven days." Go to the third picture in the queue and, no matter what it is, it will be the image for your album cover. I'm guessing you guys know how to grab images from the Web.

http://www.flickr.com/explore/interesting/7days/


4 - Use Photoshop or something similar to put it all together.

I'd really like to see what you guys come up with so if you end up making one, drop a link in the comments so you can share with the class.

For my contribution, I like to think Gøncruszka is a jangly Euronoise band from somewhere in Finland or Norway, with traces of its early black metal days slipping in now and then on the album To Attack Our Civilization.

Friday, November 30, 2007

69 years of pure Evel


As a kid in the 70s, I grew up with a unique kind of hero. There were still the astronauts, the firemen and SWAT cops, but above all there were the stuntmen.

It may have been a golden age for these daredevils, with TV specials and movies bringing them out of the background and into the spotlight. I remember growing up watching men rocketing their motorcycles over cars and through flaming rings, and women blowing themselves up in crates packed with dynamite. My toy box included the Evel Knievel stunt cycle, which you'd crank until it shot out across the floor and, appropriately enough, would usually crash spectacularly and send its helmeted rider flying. Somewhere I still have a Hot Wheels version of the Skycycle he rode down to the bottom of Snake River Canyon.

Hard-drinkin', hard-lovin' and just plain hard-livin', these men and women were with me as I jumped my bicycle off curbs and down ditches filled with cattails. But none stood as tall as Knievel.

For me, and for a lot of people (I think it'd be safe to call him the Godfather of Extreme Sports), Knievel was King. And now, after almost 40 broken bones and countless feats of daring, the King is dead at 69, ongoing illness being the one crash-landing he couldn't bounce back from.

Here's to you, Evel Knievel — thanks for showing me that a life without risk isn't worth living, and death is nothing to fear. You might not have had a perfect life, but you sure lived the hell out of it.




I don't remember where I heard it, but here's a riddle for you.

Q: Why didn't Evel Knievel make it across Snake River Canyon?

A: He was weighed down by his enormous balls.




Speaking of Snake River, here's some video, too:

Evel Knievel's Caesar's Palace jump (and legendary wipeout)!

Big Mack attack!

Snake River Canyon!

And this is just awesome.


Friday, October 12, 2007

Geek check: I should've had a d8

While I was moving my notebooks, camera and other stuff from one bag to another last night, I started looking at my gaming bag as a possible candidate.

(I'm looking for The Perfect Bag, and even though I know I don't own it I keep hoping one of them will surprise me some day; it's a search second only to my quest for The Perfect Pen.)

If you game, you know what a gaming bag is; in my case, it's a backpack I use to carry my scratch paper and pencils and player's guides and whatever else I need when I'm gaming. Of course, this also means that most of my dice are in this bag. And of course, this means I ended up spending a good half-hour or so reorganizing my dice.

REORGANIZING MY DICE.

Hey man, I needed to make sure I had plenty of d6. And then I read this entry on Wil Wheaton's blog today and was reminded that not only is he a fantastic writer and seemingly all-around good-guy, but he understands. A Yahtzee cup? C'mon.

I know most of my friends are geeks, nerds and dorks in one way or another, so let me hear it - what geeky thing have you done lately?

I told you I was looking for six-siders

Friday, October 05, 2007

Thank you, Satan!


And also thanks to E, because with the exception of the clock radio this morning I literally haven't listened to anything but Dethklok since yesterday. What I need is a dethklok radio.

If you've got any metal in your soul (and a sense of humor about it), YOU NEED THIS. It's seriously one of the best metal albums I've heard in a long time, which is pretty good for a fictional band with real talent. Go get it, and pick up the Season 1 DVD while you're at it!

Also, I may now be guilty of this.

Saturday, July 07, 2007

Hey, good-lookin'

Look who took a whirl at making an avatar - yay Lopez!!

Thursday, July 05, 2007

Los Siiiimp-soooooons!

So, an accurate depiction of yours truly in Springfield? You make the call!

By the way, this was done by using the avatar creator at the movie home page and then taking a screen shot (I didn't feel like registering for something I'd use once). If you feel like joining in on the fun, that'd be swell.

Now who's got the squishees?

Thursday, May 31, 2007

Ny ... Nyarlathotep?

I think I might be reading too much Lovecraft.

I was sitting in a meeting and eating some chocolate someone brought. The wrappers had playful little messages in them like, "You look good in red," and, "Take a bubble-bath." I opened one up and it said:


And the first thing I thought of was forest cabins and brains in metallic cylinders.

Yeah ... it might be time to re-read a Harry Potter book or something.

Friday, March 30, 2007

Weird science v.2

Yeah, I know we haven't posted anything in a while - sorry 'bout that. It's a lame excuse, but things really have been busy lately. Regular posting will begin again soon, but for now, put the needle on the record for ... SCIENCE!!!

France opens secret UFO files covering 50 years

by Marlowe Hood PARIS (AFP) - France became the first country to open its files on UFOs Thursday when the national space agency unveiled a website documenting more than 1,600 sightings spanning five decades.

The online archives, which will be updated as new cases are reported, catalogues in minute detail cases ranging from the easily dismissed to a handful that continue to perplex even hard-nosed scientists.

...

"Cases such as the lady who reported seeing an object that looked like a flying roll of toilet paper" are clearly not worth investigating, said Patenet.

But many others involving multiple sightings -- in at least one case involving thousands of people across France -- and evidence such as burn marks and radar trackings showing flight patterns or accelerations that defy the laws of physics are taken very seriously.

I saw an object that looked like a flying roll of toilet paper once, but it was after eating some bad Thai (thank you - tip your waitresses, folks!)


Conclusive proof: Vampires do not exist

The Huffington Post

Apparently some smarty-pants scientists have proven conclusively that vampires conclusively do not exist. Here's why: Each time a vampire bites someone to feed, they turn that person into a vampire, creating a cycle that doubles and doubles and doubles again, like that famous "and they told two friends, and they told two friends, and so on and so on and so on" Faberge Organics commercial from the 80's, and also like the Sorcerer’s Apprentice, and mitosis, kind of.

It's explained more smarter here:


If a single vampire fed on a single human in the first month, this would create two vampires -- and decrease the human population by one, leaving it at 536,870,911 - 1 = 536,870,910. In the second month, those two vampires would each feed, transforming two people into vampires -- so you get four vampires and a human population of 536,870,911 - 3 = 536,870,908. So you can see where this is headed. The vampire population is increasing in a geometric progression, and the population of humans is similarly decreasing -- and at that rate, the authors calculate, the entire human population would be transformed into vampires in only 30 months. QED!

So it isn't wooden stakes, sunlight or even Slayers that kill vampires - it's math. And Latin.


Bizarre hexagon spotted in Saturn’s clouds

One of the most bizarre weather patterns in the solar system has been photographed at Saturn, where astronomers have spotted a huge, six-sided feature circling the north pole.


Rather than the normally sinuous cloud structures seen on all planets that have atmospheres, this thing is a hexagon.

...

The hexagon is nearly 15,000 miles (25,000 kilometers) across. Nearly four Earths could fit inside it. The thermal imagery shows that the hexagon extends about 60 miles (100 kilometers) down into the clouds.

This is simultaneously the most disconcerting and the most awesome thing I've ever seen. I don't know what's going on with Saturn, but between this and the Eye, I think it might be a good idea to watch the skies.


Smaller Inflatable Exoskeleton

nym
- This tiny girl is wearing what's called a "Power Jacket," which is an inflatable exokeleton that weighs only four pounds.

Japanese electronics giant Matsushita Electric Industrial unveils the prototype model for a "power jacket" to help patients recover from partial paralysis during rehabilitation, at the Home Care and Rehabilitation Exhibition in Tokyo.

This is cool on so, so many levels.


Scientists discover 'shadow person'

by Erica Harrison Cosmos Online

SYDNEY: Ever feel as though you're being followed? As if someone is behind you, shadowing your every move? It might be your ‘shadow person,' created by unusual activity in a specific brain region, a new study shows.

The paper, published in the British journal Nature, describes the case of a 22-year-old woman with no history of psychiatric problems who was being evaluated for treatment of epilepsy. When a region of her brain called the left temporoparietal junction was electrically stimulated, the woman described encounters with a ‘shadow person' who mimicked her bodily movements.



When the patient was lying down, stimulation of this brain region caused her to feel that someone was behind her. … When the patient sat up, leaned forward and clasped her knees, she felt that the figure was also sitting, embracing her in its arms - a feeling she described as "unpleasant."

Do you ever get the feeling scientists just dig the idea of poking people in the brain? Just to see what happens?

Class dismissed!

Monday, January 08, 2007

Fun with conspiracy

I really doubt one thing has to do with the other, but isn't it a weird coincidence that Austin's Congress Avenue is covered with about 60 dead birds on the same morning that an unexplained smell of gas blankets most of New York City?

I'm sure glad we got that "War on Terror" thing knocked out we don't have to worry about this sort of thing anymore.

In the meantime, has anyone checked Area 51?

Friday, September 22, 2006

Geek Check (pt.2)

Here's a handy way to remind yourself you're a geek: You open your desk drawer at work to get a Post-It, and have to move a set of gaming dice and HorrorClix stat cards out of the way first.

Yeah, I can't believe I'm not an executive either.

Thursday, August 24, 2006

Weird science

Normally, I'm right there with Science. We've been buds for a long time, and that gravity thing? Fantastic.

But saying Pluto isn't a planet? I don't care what you say, Science - Pluto will always be a planet in my mind. I know you've got some things to work out, and trying to get everyone to agree on what is and isn't a planet must be tough. But c'mon - this is Pluto we're talking about. He's been a planet since he was discovered in 1930, spinning along the outer reaches of our imaginations for as long as most people have been alive. Pluto is OUR planet (so to speak).

So it crosses orbits with Neptune; so what? What has Neptune done for us lately? At least Uranus gives us a cheap laugh.

So you tell Pluto, out there on his long, lonely circuit through space, looking back at us with puppy-dog eyes, you tell him he's not a planet anymore. Because I'm not gonna do it.


Back on the homefront, we've got bigger problems. Problems about the size of a VW bug.

Giant nests perplex experts

By Garry Mitchell
Associated
Press MOBILE -- To the bafflement of insect experts, gigantic yellow jacket nests have started turning up in old barns, unoccupied houses, cars and underground cavities across the southern two-thirds of Alabama. Specialists say it could be the result of a mild winter and drought conditions, or multiple queens forcing worker yellow jackets to enlarge their quarters so the queens will be in separate areas. But experts haven't determined exactly what's behind the surprisingly large nests.

I'll tell you what it is - Step 1. Step 2 involves work camps and humans building giant hives. You don't even want to know about Step 3.

Auburn University entomologists, who say they've never seen the nests so large, have been fielding calls about the huge nests from property owners from Dothan up to Sylacauga and over into west-central Alabama's Black Belt. At one site in Barbour County, the nest was as large as a Volkswagen Beetle, said Andy McLean, an Orkin pesticide service manager in Dothan who helped remove it from an abandoned barn about a month ago.
...

Entomologist Dr. Charles Ray at the Alabama Cooperative Extension System in Auburn said he's aware of about 16 of what he described as "super-sized" nests in south Alabama. Ray said he's seen 10 of them and cautioned people about going near them because of the yellow jacket's painful sting.


Ladies and gentlemen - your "no-shit" quote of the week.

Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Geek check

How geeky can one guy get? How's this grab ya?

That's right - this is a handmade d20 necklace. I picked the die and a friend of mine (who works at the comic shop I used to work at) made it for me. I'm pretty sure that makes her geekier than me, but it might be a toss-up.

And, God help me, I plan to wear the hell out of that thing.

Lisa's also making neato, non-nerdy earrings and who-knows-what-else, so if you're in the market for this kind of stuff, pay her a visit.

I'd sell you my shame, but apparently I don't have any left.

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Cthulhu research alert!

From the Newspaper Tree:

The first big drug lord in the area was a Chinese man named Sam Hing, who peddled opium out of a fake business locale that was situated somewhere in the vicinity of what is now the intersection of Paisano Drive and Oregon Street, according to Juárez newspaper archives and Juárez city historian Ignacio Esparza-Marín. He said between 1910 and 1920 in Juárez there were places where not only opium was ingested, but also morphine and cocaine.

As always in the modern drug trade, there was a hostile takeover. In the mid-1920s, 11 Chinese immigrants dedicated to the sale of narcotics were murdered in Juárez. Their deaths were ordered by a married Juárez couple, a woman named Ignacia Jasso, nicknamed “La Nacha,” and her husband Pablo González, called “El Pablote.”


I hope this helps my fellow nerds. I thought it had some details that might help you beef up your campaign (or whatever it's called).

=)

Monday, March 06, 2006

Stop the presses!

Maybe it's a good thing I don't work at a newspaper anymore. I was looking through the headlines and saw:

Tiny hummingbirds have superb memories

And the first thing that popped into my head was:

subhed: Big ones can't remember shit

Friday, February 03, 2006

The needle and the damage done

Before me and Lopez! moved from El Paso to Austin, we owned a house. And in spite of all the ass-centric pain that comes with home-ownership, I loved that house. I never watered its lawn, but I loved it

It was a few minutes drive from Downtown, in a historic neighborhood that was quiet and urban at the same time. Wood floors, high ceilings, huge backyard, a sunroom and a half-basement – even more than we could have asked for, seriously.

Even better, our built-in-1928 house had been almost completely refurbished by the previous owner (crazy nutbar – if you know us, you know the stories) so there weren’t any major repairs we had to make.

You sharpie – you noticed the “almost,” didn’t you? Everything had been repaired and updated EXCEPT for the plumbing. Jeez, that friggin’ plumbing, man. If it wasn’t one thing, it was damn well the other, laughing at us for thinking we’d finally gotten a handle on its copper and steel pipes.

There were two major events with the plumbing; one involved having a trench dug, by hand, from the house to the alley. We’re talking CALICHE here. Damn, I feel like I should put Angel the Plumber’s kid through college or something. The other is what we refer to as the Great Flood.

One morning I wandered down to the basement and … aw, shit. At least, I was pretty sure there was some in there, since all that dirty-looking water probably meant our sewage line had backed up. Crap!

In the end, it wasn’t the washing machine like we really, really, really had been hoping it was, and we had to throw away about three-quarters of the stuff we had been storing down there. Out went old paperwork, knick-knacks in warping cardboard and, worst of all, absolutely worst of all, my turntable.

Don’t get the wrong idea – my record player was a late-80s, early 90s style piece of crap stereo. You know the kind. Hollow-sounding speakers. Dual-cassette. C’mon, you know what I’m talking about. Still, it was the only record player I had, and at the time they were already getting hard to find, and if you could find one it was super-expensive because all of a sudden everyone thought they were freakin’ Beck with their two turntables and a microphone.

I still remember letting out a monstrous, chest-deep sigh when I threw it out. Man, I'm sighing just thinking about it.

For the next – what, six, seven years? – I’d look for a record player whenever I was in the electronics department or, more likely, in a second-hand store. And I always had the same problem. Either it was too expensive (department store) or it was too junky looking to be trustworthy (thrift store). Whatever wax I owned or had access to languished, mute and looking at me with shame in its one eye.

“Don’t you love us anymore, Nel?”

Aw, c’mon, you know I do.

“Then why don’t you ever play us anymore? Is it the hissing? The pops? What?”

You know that’s not it – I love those things about you. It’s just, do you know how hard it is to find a record player nowadays? I mean, everybody listens to CDs now. Nobody listens to records anymo … oh …

" … "

Oh, baby, you know I didn’t mean …

That’s usually the part where I’d start crying, so we’ll leave it at that. The point is that last night we went to First Thursday, a monthly shopping party here in Austin. Along a five-block or so stretch of South Congress, all the shops and boutiques stay open late and people set up booths and blankets and sell their hand-made goods and art. Me and Lopez are pretty addicted to First Thursday, and we go almost every month and poke around our favorite stores.

And what did we find at one of these stores? This.



At first I thought it was an amp – I mean, I had just strummed a Hawaiian steel guitar, so I don’t think I’m totally retarded for thinking it was an amp. Lopez saw me eyeing it and said, “What is it?” I said, it’s an amp, duh, but checked the other side of the “$44” tag while I said it.

Holy shit.

I asked the lady who works there if I could get someone to show this to me, because I did not want to screw this up. So Mustache Guy comes over and tells us how, yeah, he just got this in about a week ago and they really just put it out yesterday. He tested it with an old Searchers 45 and it works great. They get record players every once in a while, but they never stay in the store long.

Of course they don’t.

As he’s talking he’s cracking it open until my turntable Venus is sitting there, pearly and cool in its vintageness. Mustache Guy’s record is still in there so he plugs everything in and starts to play it.


God, I love that first fuzzy pop when you drop the needle, almost as if the record player is clearing its throat.

I turned to Lopez, and she already knew. “If you want it,” she said, “it can be your birthday present.”

I’ve never been happier to lug a heavy piece of former school equipment five blocks in my life. And I’ve never been happier that I don’t have a basement.

Thursday, February 02, 2006

Office supplies

And now, for no reason at all, here's a random sampling of some of the toys that live in my office. They come alive at night and plot, I'm sure of it.

Oh, and I apologize for the quality of some of these photos, but I like to pretend my office is a dark cave and growl at people who walk too close to my door.



A lot of people don't know this, but Spider-Man can pop 'n lock like a mutha. Go Spidey! Go Spidey!



In another life, this guy was bad news, nearly destroying the entire friggin' multiverse single-handedly. Now he's got a very tiny head. He's not real happy about it.



Oh, Wampa. How I love you. We'll both pretend that's Luke's legbone, 'k?



Off-screen, Jet and Julia are actually married. Jet just wants to eat his pear, maybe watch a little bit of the game, but noooooo, Julia says he can't wait until after the "Late Late Show" to pick up the kids from day-care. Pfft. Women.



My fleet is mighty and swift and we take no prisoners. I mean c'mon, look at the size of these ships, where the hell would we put 'em?

Thursday, January 12, 2006

Polly want a AARGH!!

Like a lot of comics and movies geek, I'm also a science geek. I've probably been a science geek almost as long as I've been into comics, and that's a loooong time. And like a lot of kids, I was all about the dinosaurs (ankylosaurs kick ass!) and prehistory. So you can imagine what a kick I get out of the idea that prehistoric man was hunted by GIANT FRIGGIN' BIRDS!

The Ohio State study determined that eagles would swoop down, pierce monkey skulls with their thumb-like back talons, then hover while their prey died before returning to tear at the skull. Examination of thousands of monkey remains produced a pattern of damage done by birds, including holes and ragged cuts in the shallow bones behind the eye sockets ... Berger went back to the Taung skull, and found traces of the ragged cuts behind the eye sockets.

Oh, holy crap. That's so metal.

photo: AP